I would like to dispel the following rumors regarding the reasons I have not updated this website

1: I did not die in a tragic flower-related accident

2: I am not secretly selling the site to the Vermont Mafia

3: I am not the Kane Imposter on WWE

4: I have not been abducted by Al Gore

5: MySpace has not bought the rights to this website

6: I was not murdered by "hardcore reenactors" for wearing non-period underwear

7: I am not on a secret airplane ride to rid my acrophobia

8: I did not get married

9: I did not get a job as the spokesperson for Old Bedford Village

10: I did not win the lottery, move to china and spend it all on finger traps.

possible update soon,,,